Chasing Sunflowers and Rust
by doseydotes
Summary: Reflecting on a cold night, two accounts of a single sweet gesture. Rus/Bel, please leave a review! To the review from the guest asking to translate it to chinese and post somewhere else, absolutely go for it! thanks for asking!


_IVAN  
She kissed me once. She was scared and cold, it was dark and we were waiting for fireworks to begin. so I tucked her into my coat with me. My body is always so warm, so she nuzzled her face as close to my neck as possible to absorb the warmth I exude. Sneaky Natalya couldn't help herself, she placed tiny kisses on my neck with her small, soft lips. Naturally I pretended i didn't notice. "Ivan," she began, pulling her face from my neck and looking up, "look at me, is my nose red from cold?" I nodded my head yes, her nose was red. That is what cold does to noses, da? She is tricky, as i have said before. "warm my nose with yours, Ivan." She raised herself up onto the tips of her toes and pressed the side of her nose against mine. "better, yes?" she said. "Belarus you are making me nervous, why do you have to get so close all the time?" instead of taking the hint, She simply put her lips to mine, and kissed me. It was done so sweetly, it was not like her. It felt different, i was not intimidated so I kissed her back. I think, oh perhaps it was accident, yes? But her lips were warm from my neck. they were soft just like i noticed before. I try to tell myself - she is SIBLING, Ivan. do not kiss your sister. But there were so many thoughts to consider. Belarus is a good kisser. So young, where did she learn to kiss this way? What had come over her that she decided to kiss me withot threatening me or breaking something to intimidate me with first? I thought to myself, my little frail Natalya, this is so wrong. I am here to protect you as a brother. Tonight did feel special though. She deserved a kiss. It ended, and She moved her face back to my neck to keep warm.  
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NATALYA_  
_Waiting for the fireworks to start, I pretended to be cold so Ivan would hold me. He will always hold me when i am cold or frightened, he forgets for a minute that I want to marry him and he keeps me warm and safe. I only ever feel safe when he is keeping me warm. He gives away his heat for me, he must love me after all. The warmest spot is his neck, he knows i like to put my face there so he did not turn his head, and i put my face there. In an impulse i kissed his neck. stupid, stupid why did i do that, now he would surely push me away and look at me with those nervous eyes. I waited a minute, silly brother. He pretended he didn't notice. I thanked him silently. He seemed so courteous that night, and he smelled like sunflowers and rust. The familiar scent I knew all my life, sunflowers and rust. I kept thinking while i was hiding my blushing face from him. I chase him down, i threaten him, i ask him to marry me. He says no, he gets scared and nervous and he runs, so i chase. It's all about the chase, but what if one day he gives up? "I will marry you, Natalya." In my head it sounds so perfect but will he ever really love me? Marriage is on paper, yes? but love has to happen by it's self. And even so if he learned to love me and be my husband what would i chase after, then? All i've ever known is chasing Ivan, chasing after sunflowers and rust. for the same reaction every time. "No, Belarus! Leave me alone, you are my sister i do not love you that way!" Why won't he at least call me Natalya. Maybe if he called me by my name it wouldn't hurt so badly that he doesn't want me. Maybe these moments, the warm ones, are what count. He holds me so close, so safe that i'm completely alone with my thoughts, enveloped in his essence. smelling sunflowers and rust and thinking about choices and love and lust and fear. He protects me from everything. That thought moved me. I needed to kiss him, my dear and loving brother. Crazy enough i used the "my nose is cold," line. I moved my nose to his, he protested as he does normally, and I kissed him. Long and deep. surely I imagined his grip tightening around me as it happened. I always do embellish his reactions to my crazy acts. Once the kiss was over, i moved my face back to his neck to keep warm, my nose had gotten so cold in those moments. And what an excuse to smell sunflowers and rust.


End file.
